My regular insult suppliers, Magi and King James the Very Important Something or Other Amen, have been busy launching a product (if this involves champagne or any other beverage of interest they have not let on) and neglecting their Cobra duties. But as the need for fresh insults is bottomless and a Shakespearian Refrigerator Magnet Kit in the right hands can be an endless source of cruelty and fun, renowned wit Evelyn Jensen has offered the following crop of barbs:

Tedious Little Snake Buttock
Perfidious Biter of Sheep
Thou Creeping Goat Scab
Quintessence of Puke

In the bright or darkling hour you will find that these have awesome power, sewn with reason's silver thread your foe you'll surely rip and shred. Go get 'em, baby.

(Written by Sharon C. McGovern)

From Vol. 15
Get Back to Work!